Carl Tuttle

I'm sitting here, up at 12:30AM, a very rare occurance, thinking about a time it wasn't so rare.
For a long time I would have sleepless nights, which led to fear of more sleepless nights. Now it's the exception, something that happens to everyone from time to time. Nothing to worry about or get anxious over, cool.
I have a tendancy to be very hard on myself taking the blame for everything and anything in an effort to make peace with those who would point the finger and condemn. I don't feel that way any longer, I just don't care, I'm happy.
Do I wish things have happened differently? Yes! Would I like to have a relationship with those whom I came to love and admire over the years? Yes! Does it matter in the end if I do or I don't? Or if things happened differently? Not really. Things are the way they are, you have to deal with them, embrace them and continue to move forward.
It is much easier for some people to plow through the circumstances of their lives and move forward than others. We experience things and process things differently, that's just the way it is.
So what if it takes one person to come back from a hamstring injury less time than another? It takes what it takes, it's not a moral issue. One person is better, more spiritual or whatever because they overcome faster than another. Yet that is what we do so often, we turn issues that are not moral issues into issues of right and wrong, when in fact they may be neither.